Pregnancy hormones..


I feel like writing a lot about what’s happening in my life, but somehow it’s not happening. maybe I should say that I have become more lazy with the second baby. ok, now I need to give a name for the second one, hmmm.. Chunty?? sounds matching to Bunty na.. its an obsession, can change it.

I should admit that I am being little careless with Chunty or after taking care of Bunty and office, I dont seem to have any energy for Chunty. I keep forgetting to take my folic acid, or nausea pills.  I just puke out everything after every meal. I don’t remember how it was during BUnty time. weird na, yes I don’t remember how it was.  What I remember is ,I used to be hungry always. My temper was bad.  This time I dont feel like having any food. Best part is I am no more hygiene conscious. I eat the road side pani-puri before going home, rely on Amul Badam milk. Yup dont have energy to cook anything after going home, so I have something outside and then go home.

Another Big thing I realised is, it’s not easy to have second baby with a toddler around. So many things we do, though we are not supposed to do. like carrying the toddler around. Sleeping next to them, realise the mistake only after they kick us in sleep. though you want to sleep after going home from work, it’s not possible as the First one is eagerly waiting for you to do the Homework and you also need to run around to feed the toddler.

Suddenly at home there is pressure to have a Boy baby, as though it’s in my hands. it’s all just because I already have a girl baby. What is their problem I don’t understand. MIL is praying to all possible God for a grandson. Best part is even after all that she doesnt take care of me. She still expect me to be normal and do all my regular house works.

Hormones are making me think all weird. Suddenly I feel hubby doesnt care for me anymore.( he is busy with new project and new office). but still he has to talk to me and ask about my health right?. He is not doing it. the same hubby took “work from home” option during BUnty time, he used to cut all fruits and pack it for me. Now all that is gone. he calls to check on his parents and his daughter and not me.  It is making me feel little lonely. He should ask about my nausea, monthly check ups and diet na.  How can he just ignore just because it’s my second time??

I am tired so soon, Just praying God that this phase runs quickly. But totally worried how would I take care of Bunty and Chunty alone.. :(.  happy that I would take 6 months leave and go to my parents place. :).

Television: Me, sister and Bunty.


 Image

There were days when I used to completely love watching TV. I was not bothered if it was a board exam next day. Let me explain.

Age gap between me and my sister is 10 years. So, when I was 15 and giving my board exam, she was just 5 years old, studying UKG. She never used to let me study. So my parents used to take her out in evenings, so I would get some time to study and come back my 9 pm. They trusted me and wanted me to study well for my exams. But what did I do? I used to watch the new released movie in cable TV. those days all the Cds used to come with subtitles. So I used to Mute the volume and watch it. I used to know our TVS Lil champ sound. So, I used to put back the same channel which my were watching when they left and go inside my room. I was conscious not to switch on the fan. yes, if I switch it off, then they will know that I was in living room right.

one of such days, they were screening Mohabatein. being hard core fan of SRK, I could give the movie a miss even though I had math’s exam next day. when my parents came back, I was all emotional. had to get into to the toilet to cry out.

then when it was my sisters turn, she was more open. she used to say, she need break. she used come out and watch a  movie. yes it used to 3 hours break and then get back to her studies.

now, why am I saying these days?? here is the actual saga.

we were watching tangled movie with Bunty. I changed the channel when there was a Kissing scene. But the remote being little slow, the channel switched to next one only after the kissing scene started. Bunty stopped me .

Bunty: Why are you changing?

me: I wanted to see what is coming in next channel

Bunty: But I want to see the kissing scene.

Me: what? I want to see that only. ( and she started crying)

MIL came in between asking what happened. I couldn’t explain. After some time, Bunty came to me asked if she can kiss me. when I said yes, and showed her my cheeks, she said, NO Not there. I am not sure what happened, may be the little one understand my shocked face and kissed me on my nose and went away.

so my dear mommy bloggers, did this happen to you? how do you mange?? It’s ok if she kisses me on my lips, But I don’t want her to do it with everyone.. 

Bunty tales..


  • she order what has to be packed in her lunch box previous night . I feel blessed, I don’t have to run in morning for the ingredients. generally she demands, idli with sambar, poori or noodles. She also checks her box in the morning before going to school. isnt she smart?? Once I told her how my mother forgot and kept an empty box for my lunch.
  •  she get bored of a toy in a day. with so much of thoughts and money I buy her a toy, she doesn’t even play with it twice.
  •  Bunty likes to dress up. but now a days, she wants to wear only t-shirts and pants. all the frocks are crying to be worn. she loves a spegati top very much. everyday night she wants to wear that only. SO, like the 50 dates movie, we need to wash it and keep it ready for her every day.
  •  Bunty likes repeat everything I do. one day, she was getting late to school. her grandma was about to lock the door and take her. Bunty asked her not to lock the door. she ran inside. she took my lip balm, applied it on her lips. applied little moisturizer on her hands and came out running it seems. everybody started laughing .

Yes i have Smart Suraksha with me and My daughter her


There are so many families in India who just don’t embrace the birth of a female child. let it educated, un-educated, rich-poor, its all the same feel when its comes to this particular aspect. this happened with me too. when my father was not ready to accept me when I was born, as I was a FEMALE, I wish I had smart Suraksha with me to tell him, there is no difference between a girl child and boy child except for the genitals. Though i am still surviving they had a wish to have a SON. that is why i wanted a Suraksha, a self realisation app which can change the mindset of the parents, the minute the button is pressed.

Almost every girl in this world get abused sexually. the severity of the case changes with the person and situations. I was too a victim not once or twice, but for so many years as i was not educated about sexual abuse or child abuse. when I was being touched inappropriately by peon in the school or relative, I wish there was smart Suraksha with me which would send message to my parents, school principal and the teachers and helped me from so many traumatic nights.  yes, I belong to era where openly talking about such things to parents is forbidden. if pressing a button could do it, I wish I had it then.

Sending girls fir higher studies itself is question mark in so many families.  fighting and getting admission in a good college was a great challenge. finally i managed to  get admission in a prestigious university. Still, how many every degree’s a man gets, his physical need and development is more than his mental or knowledge development. when I was in college, there were so many people on the campus road teasing every women crossing the road. the comments invariable used to made me  cry.  especially when those guys goings on triples come so close to scare me, and half the time they succeeded in touching. most of the times, I didn’t even know the culprit to complain, as they hide their faces under the helmet.  I wish there was smart Suraksha with me, which would send message to police station, dean and automatically debar them from college. I was scared of telling this at home, as that would be invariably stopping me from studying further.

Most of the women are sent for work for better earning to the family and finding a better groom in the market. I was also sent to work for the same reason. not that my family survived because of my income. because i had to save for my wedding. I managed to get placed in a good company. when I was at work, there were few higher officials who use to stand behind me in the name of monitoring my work, looked directly into my dress.  Any amount of layers of cloths didn’t protect me from their X-ray eyes.when I try to get up, he would hold my hand and move the computer mouse in the name of checking the document. I wish there was smart Suraksha with me, which would send message to his family ( as they need to know about him)and the CEO of company. yes I was helpless in spite of being capable of handling the situation as the person who misbehaves himself is the in charge of  women grievance in office.

when I was of marriageable age( according to my parent), so many came and saw me as a product in display for buying. few told i was shirt, few felt i was dark, few wanted me to quit work after marriage ,few dared to ask my past indirectly trying to find out about my virginity. I wish there was smart Suraksha with me, which would send message to his and my parents, showing the true nature of their children. though we call ourselves a developing country, our country will never develop with such people and their mentality.

there are so many incidents in which i could have used the smart suraksha in past… So many people fought for women rights and safety in past, so many are doing now. through out only one thing is constant, ” Women safety is always at stake”. May be always their is dependency.

now that I have a daughter of my own, I no more wish I had smart Suraksha with me. as I will be having one to ensure that she is always safe. even if she is not able to communicate with me, I want to ensure that she can reach me any time when she needs me. I need to teach her not depend on others for their approval at any stage of her life. she needs to decide what is right for her. if a person touches her, if she is capable of hitting him back, i will teach her to do that.  that would be SELF SURAKSHA. if a knowledge going to help her, remove the barriers in society, i will teach her the SURAKHSA knowledge.  if she is being abused at later stage, i will teach her the SURAKHSA confidence to move ahead in life( work or partner) . when she is really in need and cant fight herself, then i would give her the Smart Suraksha App. The weapon which would definately save her, when she is in need and cant fight by helrself anymore.

I am participating in the Seeking Smart Suraksha contest at BlogAdda.com in association with Smart Suraksha App

Conversations


Bunty: snake snake!!!

MIL: where?

Bunty shows some hair rolled and fallen on floor near the staircase

Neighbor: oh my daughter would put it. Sorry

Bunty: you put snake in my house. I will put big snake in your house

Neighbor: how will you get it?

Bunty: I will collect whatever you throw, and put it in ur house

Neighbor: I will get scared na..

Bunty: then don’t throw snake in my house ok??

All of us had a good laugh. She picks up arguments like adults.

——————————————————————————————————————-

I took Bunty on flight when I went to Chennai. On return trip she understood that its MIL’s first time on flight.

Bunty: namma, she that bus there

MIL: ok

Bunty: namma, aeroplane will not come here. Bus will take us there.

MIL: is it?

Bunty: yes yes.

We take out seats in plane

Bunty: namma wear that belt. Or else that aunty with lipstick will scold u.

MIL gave a confused look. I had to tell that’s the airhostess. Bunty was so sweet to give the window seat to MIL .

Bunty: keep the cotton in ur ears like this.

MIL follows her instructions obediently like a kid.

Bunty: namma see there, we will go up now.

I was surprised throughout the trip. When I narrated the incident to my mother, she told me that, she was the one who explained the process to Bunty. Bunty remembered everything and tried to teach the same to her namma( my MIL).

Bunty has become parrot in the house, always repeating whatever we say and instructing her toys to eat food and drink milk etc etc.

Diwali updates.


I was so scared that, Bunty might get scared of these loud sounds of bursting crackers, but she proved me wrong. Yes, my little one enjoyed cracker. She was ready to hold the sparklers and wanted more and more.  She finished all our crackers, raided my neighbors’ house and finished their sparklers and match boxes too.  What can I do with such a kid, who bosses around neighbors’ houses too?

We went downstairs with other people in apartment. Bunty wanted other crackers too. I had tough time holding her and not letting her go near the 100 wala’s and flowerpot.  Bunty thinks that she can play with them too. Smart one she is, she doesn’t cry even if the sparkler’s particle fall on her. She just leaves it on my hand or drops it down without fuss. But she is scared of diyas. If we keep them near the entrance, she is scared to cross the doorway. End of the day, she got used to them too, and started blowing them down like candles, clapping her hands and saying happy.. ( yes she was trying to sing happy b’day, but she has not got b’day word to pronounce).

Regarding expressions of Bunty, she was all excited to see light and sparks and sounds. Unlike other kids in apartment, she enjoyed and helped us enjoy without crying.

Note to self: buy more crackers.  Or else Bunty is going to burn you.. J.

As I promised here are the pictures.

‘Motherhood: A Song For Life’


Participate in the Motherhood: A Song For Life contest, and share an interesting story about your beautiful journey of motherhood. chk for link.
Yes , I cant agree more with this video. It just depicts my feeling as a mother, the confusion when I got pregnant, the excitement of child birth and exhaustion while coping up with work and kid.

So, how to I describe my song? I don’t even know to sing. So, what do I do? I go and see people sing, learning to sing. I take tips from them on singing. The only mistake I do here is not asking the teacher about singing.

This explains my state when I decided to become pregnant, I browsed, spoke to people who were pregnant all that, but never talked about it to my mother or doctor for that matter. The reason was as silly as, pregnancy is equal to sex had before. Just couldn’t take out this equation from my mind, which was the first obstruction stopping me to learning singing properly.

Ok well, I got pregnant. Which came in as shock. Yes I wanted to become pregnant, but I didn’t want the news to break the very next month. ( I am spoiled seeing the drama in movies). There was no surprise or preparation, just shouted the news to hubby who was standing out the bathroom door. ( now I think how much surprising I could have made the announcement) .

Singing begins. Whenever I go off the tune, people where there to guide me. there is an arangrethram . ( the first dance/song performance on stage). Later the test day was announced.

Pregnancy continued, the formal announcement to neighbors and relatives was performed as function called seemantham. People where there to guide me on what to eat, how to be , what not to do etc etc. we all waited for the THE DAY to arrive.

I thought I had mastered the art of singing. But only to realize that whatever I learnt had no correlation to what the surrounding is, like how professional work is different from what is learnt is college.

I prepared my own notes for the song. I sat and framed my own tunes. Right or wrong was secondary, me able to adapt to the new tune was essential.

Child birth and breast feeding , hmmm what to I say, it’s part of motherhood, but even with the knowledge of the 7 swaras, it is still difficult to bring out the right combination to bring up kids or tackle them.

Mastering one form of music is just not enough. We need to change according to our only and only growing audience. We need to entertain according to the mood.

By the time I mastered one way of music, my daughter would want me to sing a contemporary songs . when I was settled with comfortable feeding, leaving her with in-laws and joining back work, she demanded that I feed her all night. I know I was away all day, but had to compensate in night. And now I am trying new ways to stop breast feeding her.

She is 16 months old now, but she knows how to make me sing. She decides the tunes for me, lyrics for me. I know she will demand more when she grows up, I need to grow with her. I need to know the notations to keep track of her vaccination and medical needs, sing in melody of her academic curriculum, be rhythmic with her games.

I am not sure if ever I will be ready to give a concert in spite of so many years of singing. When I can still find faults with my mother after so many years, I am sure even my daughter would never accept me as a perfect singer.

Dear bunty,

Let me tell you my dear baby, I am new to this motherhood, feel always new to it with your changing demand, I would be careful in bring you up again this evil filled society, stay in tune with you and explore the joy of parenthood. But promise me that you will sing along with me, make me enjoy my singing. We are not bothered about other audience, as long as we feel we are singing right song and music.

Loving amma,

“Singing the song of life”

 about the contest partner: 

Mom & Me, the chain of stores from Mahindra Retail, has been built around the unique needs of mothers to be, young mothers, infants and children up to the age of nine. Products include maternity & infant apparel; mother’s & baby wellness, nursery, food & nutrition, travel & safety and toys & games under Private Label, Exclusive International Brands and Indian brands. In a short span of time, Mom & Me successfully created a strong brand with pan India presence, operating over 100 stores across 43 cities in India by 2012.

BUnty-tail.. nope tales..


Reading all the blog friends post, I realized that I am not writing much about bunty. She has been doing lots of things, which I have been telling everybody around me(even if they are bored or it’s a repetition) but not my blog friends. So here are the tales of the tailed bunty.

She has great fascination towards dog. She gets so excited seeing them or listening to barking sound on roads. She gives the sweet expression of discovering Dog and recognizing its sound.

You tell her “KUKKA” ( Dog in telugu) she immediately says “BOW BOW”..

Other day I took her to zoo. I was showing her white tiger. Immediately she said “PEDA KUKKA”( big dog) I simply hat to nod my head. He was so excited that she wanted to take the massive animal home, was showering all love by giving flying kiss and saying Bye to White tiger.  Yes for us every animal is KUKKA and every bird is KAKKA( crow).

unexpectedly  she picks up new words and uses them rightly too.

Now we have learnt cow,dog and coeo( crow),eg(pig).. of course the kach( catch) and goo girl( good girl) after all the task performed.

So I am also becoming a goo mummy keeping track of her growth in blog at last.